2008 Top Worst Jobs
2008 Top Worst Jobs

Dan: Mahalo Al....

Al: Good morning to you Dan, this is quite nice non-soggy day in soggy Seattle. 

Dan: I KNOW, this is awesome and a great day to discuss one of the top covered news items in the world today.

Al: Dan must mean land country Kosovo is condemning US land country area for supporting Serbia's declaration of independence?? 

Dan: No - better!!

Al: Hhmm....must be the recent happening that 57 Earth peoples were arrested in Saudi Arabia for trying to increase odds with ladies outside of holy and sacred building.... Al can't recall exactly but it was holy shrine???

Dan: uuhhmm...no.  It was actually a mall.  A shopping mall.  They were arrested by the country's RELIGIOUS POLICE.  In budget meetings they figured out they could only afford 1 set of police and the debate was between a traditional Crime Police, Religious Police and a Fashion Police. Saudi Arabia clearly has it's priorities straight.

They obviously have not seen MallRats - so they don't know what REALLY goes on at malls.  You'll need a few minutes.....



Moving forward!  Today Al, we are going to to talk about something more impactful then the ever changing Geo-political landscape of the world and will hit home to our devoted fans - all 3 of them...that we are paying....

Today, MSNBC covered the Top Jobs of 2008 for the United States of which isn't a big shocker and I know you pretty much agree with Al.

Al: Yes and Al is hesitant to sound like broken record BUT Al love demonstrating superior intellect so Al will give a quick recap.

It is simple, if Earth peoples want to make more than standard living wage - the biggest areas to get into are around more technical technology positions that are in high demand in US land territory.  Currently large high technology companies such as General Electric, IBM, Microsoft, Intel, Dell, etc.. are lobbying to increase available authorizations to bring in technical talent from other countries - most prominently India land country.

Companies like mentioned are doing well despite US economy issues because they do not exclusively operate in US economy - they operate in global economy.  If US land country economy loses, there will be winners around Earth planet which will keep global Earth companies operating and growing.

Dan: Alright, alright, we get it.. get an education and do work that can't be easily outsourced.  Ok, that's easy but here's is what's not - Tell me Al - What are the Top 5 Worst Jobs in 2008??

Al: Good Paradigm Shift - here is Al's thoughts:

5. Petroleum Distribution Technician - Demand is low because only US area Oregon and one other area has these positions, oil companies are making buckets of currency, you see nothing, you're freezing your ass off, your fingers smell like gas and you don't look like this so the tips are well...sub-par....



4. Dolphin Trainer - Earth person follows their dream, love for Dolphins and gets job as Dolphin trainer.  Great Correct?!?!?  No - how would it feel to find out some day that no other group of Earth peoples were so close to getting the message that Earth was doomed but despite hundreds of years worth of Dolphin training and performances you still couldn't understand what they were saying to you.......for $35-65k per year??

Al rest Al's case...



3. Cabaret Hostess (Not Waitress) - Although you work in longest standing and surviving industry that regardless of economic situation, there will always be demand for adult entertainment establishments - You, the hostess - are a low paid middlemen/women that patrons must interact ("interact" = pay $5-$25 admission and show ID card) with to get to the "show" where the true dollars and tips will be spent.

Some Earth peoples holding this occupation may say "hey!  I could dance if I want to but I don't, I'm better than that!!"  No - there are models and then there are janitors who work at the model agency - if they could be models, they would.

2. Casino Dealer - Similar to #3 on the list, you have job security.  Earth peoples are irrational and will always more often than not prefer to wager the $200 they have left over after each pay check with hopes of hitting the jackpot on blackjack, DESPITE the fact that if the house did not win more often than not, they would not be in business. 

Unfortunately for you, odds are that you are not working on the Las Vegas strip and IF you are, you are working at the Imperial Palace (which is scheduled for demolition in 3 years) and are Dealer-Impersonator-Entertainer putting up with drunkards and making $13/hour.....that you will turn around and lose at the Imperial Palace.




Similar to a Warrior-Poet minus the glory and artistic ability....

1. Statue Street Performer - You have hit the bottom of the barrel.  After a number of career changes ranging from those occupations listed above to an overseas assignment as litter patrol in Singapore (think about it....think about it..... ok.. you got it!) you have sat down and had a heart to heart with yourself.

You've inventoried all of your skills and passions and have concluded that the perfect job for you combines your passion for doing nothing, top skills of remaining motionless and inhuman tolerance for people publicly mocking you.  The payoff for the investment society, your parents have made in your education and pursuing your calling - whatever loose change people have in their pockets, are willing to give away AND when it is not raining.

By the way - debit and credit cards are REALLY hurting the "loose change" industry....


Comments
#1. Manish commented, on July 11th, 2008 at 1:25 p.m.:

I think that's cause for moving Dolphin trainers to #1. Atleast street performers don't have the added risk of potentially being clubbed by a dolphin's tail.


#2. ashleystixx commented, on March 23rd, 2008 at 8:42 p.m.:

Al must have never worked at McDonalds in high school....in a booming metropolis outside of Fargo...


#3. Manish commented, on March 24th, 2008 at 9:19 p.m.:

Calling all street performers!! Not that I think you can afford a PC and a reliable internet connection but how much do you really make?????


#4. M commented, on June 22nd, 2008 at 8:39 p.m.:

As a dolphin trainer.........35-65K a year doesn't exist. I barely make 28K before taxes.


#5. Nadcadss commented, on September 23rd, 2008 at 7:56 p.m.:

comment5,


#6. Wbslagat commented, on September 23rd, 2008 at 7:56 p.m.:

comment3,


#7. Gorlfigm commented, on September 23rd, 2008 at 7:56 p.m.:

comment5,


#8. name commented, on September 28th, 2008 at 4:54 p.m.:

comment5,


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