Conspiracy: Valentine's Day
Valentine's Day 2008

Dan: Alright Al, I HATE this but tomorrow this will be a HUGE story, mainly in the US and other more developed countries of the world where there is enough money available to waste on materialistic gestures of feelings.

Let's get it over with and talk Valentine's Day.

Plus I got to hurry up and run to Safeway and pick up some roses and chocolates.....

Al: Al excited to learn about this day of celebration.  Al figures it must be extremely big as Al has seen advertisements for Valentine's Day since before New Earth Year.

Al have many questions.... like....

Who is Valentine and what made her so important that she gets her own day?  Must have accomplished something very large if there are millions of types of Valentine's Day cards and no Martin Luther King Day cards.

There is not even President's Day cards?!?!

So WHO is Valentine?????


Dan: wow.... uhhmm... I don't know actually....

Al: Wait...Al confused...

So you don't know who is being commemerated on this holiday with public and commercial exposure only rivaled by Christmas???

Dan: hhhmm..... no, but I'm not much of a historian though so...

Al: CHRISTMAS!!!!  HOLIDAY WHICH CELEBRATES THE BIRTH OF MOST HUMAN PEOPLE'S BELIEF - SAVIOR & CREATOR OF HUMAN RACE???? 

Valentine is celebrated almost the same and Dan nor most human's know who Valentine is???


Dan: Don't quote me on this BUT..... I think he was....a..... catholic - you know, the whole Saint part of it.  Like maybe the Patron Saint of ..... LOVE ..... OR....

ROSES and CHOCOLATES.... or something..

Yeah!  Kind of like St. Patrick's Day.  St. Patrick - Patron Saint of Irish Beer and Whiskey!

Al: Al check Wikipedia to get to bottom of mystery...

<5 minutes later>

GASP!?!?!  Wikipedia have references but there is no definitive answer.  Seems like Earth human peoples, and primarily US peoples, have duct-taped together many myths and traditions to start a not-based in fact ritual of annual gift giving.... BUT WHY???


Dan: Listen Al, I DON'T KNOW!! 

Watch this - it might help you understand....




All I know, is that on Valentine's Day, since grade school you buy cards and chocolates and give them to other people - preferably girls for me.

I make an extra effort because growing up, in grade school, my card envelope would always be bulging least full of cards - so I started giving out
SUPER AWESOME cards.

Like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle love cards, Michael Jordan trading cards.... and the most popular ones..

MEXICAN ELECTRONIC MUSIC CARDS!!!  The kind that you open up and it plays music with blinking lights.

The girls totally ate that up - it WAS GRANDIOSE!!!!!!!

So now, we all get people cards and candy because you don't want to be the one left with no CARDS and NO CANDY!!!

Al: Al know Earth people humans are irrational.  But this does not make sense!!  No way human's can be this blind and misled .... or can they???

Dan: Al - I KNOW WE DON'T KNOW what Valentine's Day really is OR WHO Valentine really was BUT if you want to find out the truth STOP and think.

You need to be careful what you ask for because curiosity may kill the cat....or something like that.

Either way, I know who you can call to help.

Just be forewarned - this is a door that once open, cannot be closed.  A bundle of sticks, that cannot be unbundled.  A gaggle of geese that cannot be ungaggled.....

I present to you ....
THE HARDLY BOYS...


Comments
#1. Rfcvcgrk commented, on September 23rd, 2008 at 7:56 p.m.:

comment5,


#2. Psgntblb commented, on September 23rd, 2008 at 7:56 p.m.:

comment5,


#3. Lhyehamp commented, on September 23rd, 2008 at 7:56 p.m.:

comment1,


#4. name commented, on September 28th, 2008 at 4:53 p.m.:

comment5,


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